Every week, I do the same hike near at the same time and take the same trail. It leads out to a rock overhang, where you can see trees and farms for miles and feel the wind from every direction. I’ve never had a problem with heights or the hike, and love going early in the morning to be in nature in solitude.
An early-morning walk is a blessing for the whole day
Henry David Thoreau
I keep this routine because I enjoy it, but every so often I think to myself, “I am going to do something different today.” And this past week while I was standing on the edge of the cliff and looking out over the woods, I looked down and noticed another rock plateau below me that jutted out. And I thought “I want to be there.”
To get there, I had to back track to the trail from the edge of the cliff, and go around the back of the overhang to it’s far side, climb along a narrow crevice on the opposite side of the plateau before crawling between two rocks to get to the space I had eyed-up. But my heart started pounding each time I got near the two rocks that blocked my path.
The way the rocks were formed you could not see your feet while walking along the edge, and there are not many hand holds along the surface of the rock. The first time I tried to cross it I gave up almost immediately, and climbed down the crevice. But looking back up at the rocks, I knew I couldn’t give up, and in my head I thought “Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway.”
I was surprised by this, because it was a title of a book I had read several years ago, and until that moment I never thought that it had a strong impact on me. The second attempt I made I began breathing heavy, and thought I would fall off and into the woods below me. I back tracked several feet, but looking forward at the rocks I knew I could not give up yet.
It was only when I positioned myself so that I could crawl between the two rocks and stare out into the forest and below that I was able to get to the other side of the rock plateau. I literally had to be facing my fears – the fall that scared me – in order to achieve my goal.
The view from the rock plateau was nothing astounding. But the feeling of accomplishment I gained lifted an unseen weight I had been carrying on my shoulders. It made me feel confident in myself – that I had accomplished something.
Remember that underlying all our fear is a lack of trust in ourselves.
Susan Jeffers, Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway
It also made me reflect on what had happened in my mind. “Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway” was the name of a book by Susan Jeffers that was recommended to me by a friend I had made at my part-time university job. At the time of reading the book I loved it, and wrote down every quote from the book I felt resonated with life.
However, it had little to no impact on me at that time. I was gung-ho about the ideas in the book, but didn’t actively make changes to my life implementing them. And it was only in this random moment where I was overwhelmed with adrenaline that it came back to me.
Part of me wants to keep seeking out these opportunities. Another part of me wants to release this new found energy that is bottle up inside me. But mostly, I want to no longer be afraid of the risks I always think about taking, but never take the time to do.
Chasing serendipity 